The Stuff of Nightmares

In this dream, my sweet Sahara had been abducted, and our doctor stood there telling me everything that had happened to her while she was not with me - horrible things, things that would change all of us forever. These are the feelings I was left with, am still left with...

Those fatal words are uttered - you fall to the floor trembling, needing tears but finding nothing satisfactory. Those words, every mother's worst nightmare, leave you dying inside and out, tearless and dry, holding yourself because there's nothing else to grab onto and you need to choke the life out of something or someone and you know that need will never be fulfilled...

And you lay there gasping, rasping, screaming for breath, while the whole world stands over you, looking down, wringing their hands and wrinkling their brows... Finally, you wake. "It was only a dream, it was only a dream, it was only a dream", and now the sobs come, the tears flow, the shaking hasn't quit, and you feel the urge to vomit... "It was only a dream, only a dream, only a dream..." and there is some relief, but still that thing holds onto you, that fear, that sickness, and you wonder if you will ever be normal after this...